I was in a mate's car the other day and the song 'Flaunt It' by TV Rock happened to come on. My mate then proceeded to sing along and bob his head in an idiotic fashion. He also commented to me, and I quote "Man, this shit is sick. This is how music should be made." Well, it's plain for all to see that our very friendship was in danger of being compromised. His statement that TV Rock smoked defied everything musically that I stand for. At last he figured out that I didn't like the song. Maybe my statements of "This shit blows" and "Oh my god this sucks" put him on to the trail. He then asked me what was wrong with it, to which I countered what's right with it?
The fool then said "ahhh the beat". Yeh man, the beat in this is leik awsum dude. For the idiots who don't come to terms with sarcasm too well, the beat is actually horrifically white. Yeah man 4/4, beats one and two, no syncopation. The verdict is in. Flaunt It swings like a rusty gate.
After explaining this to my ill advised contempary, he mentioned the lyrics. "Ah, surely Jonno, you're a fan of the lyrics" Actually I wasn't. "This track's designed to make you cream" and "Shake what yo' mamma gave ya'" ? I don't think so. The lyrics of this atrocity have as much finesse, grace and linguistic genius as a palsy victim attemting open brain surgery. Yep the lyrics blow hard. I then pointed out the bullshit synth strings chromatic descending pattern that tries to give the song a climatic feel. Needless to say it failed quite spectacularly.
My friend, after the startling revelations posed by myself, now indulges himself with rather more shapely forms of music. Namely Jazz and Funk.
In short, Flaunt It is bullshit. Proof that modern music has about the same quantity of creativity as the stupid drawings 3 year olds do at kindergarten.
1 comment:
Heh heh, you have no Cbox, so I guess I'll comment here. And yes, you have every reason to update more, for these are the blogs which need to be read! I went to the Australia Day Concert...the gay one in Canberra...and had the honour of watching TV Rock perform live. Every other idiot was jumping up and down and having head spasms, which I can only assume was dancing. It was bloody awful; I was on the verge of either getting sharp implements to throw at them or to gouge out my ears...which probably wouldn't have been the best idea....anyhoo. You're blog is awesome; and deserves attention. :) Next time I come here I'll post a link to a blog template I've been working on...with a music theme. The templates Blogger provides are awful...bwuh. >.> Tootles, Buh Byes...any other crappy way of saying 'this is the end of my comment...' :)
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